


Stay With Me

by Angel_Waters



Category: Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter - Laurell K. Hamilton
Genre: Angst, F/M, Friendship, Happy Ending, Romance, Temporary Character Death, premeditated murders, unintentional character deaths
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-19
Updated: 2013-06-19
Packaged: 2017-12-15 12:43:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/849701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angel_Waters/pseuds/Angel_Waters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anita decides it’s time to leave the boys. Permanently. It can only mean their deaths. Who will she call in to help her when she most needs it? And will she ever be able to tell him how she really feels, or will it be too late by the time she tries?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Revelation

***** CHAPTER ONE: The Revelation *****

I had been so very stupid. I had been so incredibly naïve. How could I have possibly let things go this far? Oh, wait. I remember now. I had been so very much in love. Hah! If they had any idea what love was, I would eat my gun. And not just any one of my guns, either. I would eat my favorite gun, my Browning. I would devour it, bullets and all. Let me tell you this right now, and make it perfectly clear: that would so never happen. Not in this lifetime, at the very least. I would even go so far as to say not in any lifetime.

They had used me at every turn, every single chance they’d had. They only wanted me for the power I had to offer them. Richard’s reasons were at least a little noble, at first. He didn’t want to have to kill Marcus. He wanted to be strong enough, powerful enough, that Marcus would back down and let him take over without a fight. He wanted to protect the pack. It was all really very sweet at the time. But, of course, that couldn’t last for long. Jean-Claude had only ever wanted me so he could show off how he’d tamed the Executioner. Yeah, riiight. Tamed my ass. I would show him just how much he had tamed me!

But, in order to do so, I needed some help. There was only one person who I could truly count on for something like this, for something so unbelievably important, for something that had to be done exactly the right way from the very beginning. There would be no second chances. It was either done correctly, or it was game over. I hadn’t heard from him in so long. I wondered if he’d ever gotten married to that weak little… But this wasn’t the time to think about that. I needed to get my affairs in order and call in a favor.

One I probably wouldn’t be able to ever repay.

Because I would probably be dead.


	2. The Favor

***** CHAPTER TWO: The Favor *****

“Hi there, Edward. This is Anita. I have a job for you. Hell, I’m willing to owe you for it. You can call it a favor if you want. You will like this one, though. I promise. Call me soon,” I said. I smiled as I left the message, knowing that it would pique whatever curiosity Death might have in him.

It took all of thirty seconds for the phone to ring.

“Hello?” I asked, not wanting to assume it was him.

“Anita.”

“Edward,” I grinned. Who cared if he heard it in my voice? I was genuinely happy to hear from him.

But, as always, we lapsed into silence. It was our little test to see who would cave first. Surprisingly, it wasn’t me this time.

“You mentioned something about a job I might like, a favor for you?”

“I’m going to kill them. I need backup, and probably some new toys.”

“I’m in,” he answered. Then a pause before, “What changed your mind?”

“I am not going to admit that you were right all along, Edward. You can forget about it, if that’s what you’re hoping to hear. But things have gone way down hill since I got back home after my visit to Santa Fe. I took the fourth mark, so now I’m truly his human servant. That doesn’t bother me so much, although I still don’t like the idea. But all of this weird shit keeps coming up, stuff that should in no way ever be happening. Most of it shouldn’t even be possible. I don’t want to explain it all over the phone.” I didn’t want to ever explain, if I could help it. Telling him about the _ardeur_ would not be my idea of a good time.

“I’ll be there first thing in the morning.”

“Good. Oh, and Edward? One more thing, just out of curiosity...”

“Hmm?" 

“How is everything with Donna? And how are the kids?”

“We’ll talk about that when I get there tomorrow,” he said quietly. Then, he hung up on me as usual. That secretive bastard.


	3. Explanations

***** CHAPTER THREE: Explanations *****

After talking to Edward, I had a long to-do list.

First things first: update my will. I went to another lawyer at Ronnie’s firm for it. I didn’t want her to worry, and I didn’t want to answer all her questions about it. The man I went to was curious, but didn’t say anything. He just did as I asked and made sure she’d see it in the event of my death. Good man.

Next on my list was dealing with Bert. I was so not looking forward to that. And, to top it off, he made me wait. As payment, I didn’t bother buttering him up.

“I need a break, Bert. I’m taking some time off. I won’t be in for a few days, maybe a week.”

“What do you mean? Anita, you can’t keep doing this! These people have paid good money to see you.”

“I know, Bert. I’m sorry. They’ll just have to reschedule or go to one of the other animators. I can’t do it right now.”

“What do you propose I tell them?”

“I’m taking some personal time off,” I shrugged.

“Anita!”

“There’s no need for you to yell, Bert. I’m sitting right here. I can hear you perfectly well. But I am not going to come in, so figure out something to tell them and don’t hassle me about it. There are some things I need to take care of.”

“One of these days, Anita, I really am going to fire you.”

“No, you won’t. You need me, Bert. I bring in more money than all of the other animators combined. Every client that comes in here hopes they’ll get me. Most of them flat-out ask for me. If I leave, you’re going to lose that edge. We both know you’re not willing to do that.”

“I know,” he sighed.

I just nodded and left. He’d figure out what to do about the clients. It wasn’t my problem anymore.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

The house was quiet when I got home. The shifters were still out for the picnic I’d suggested they go on, followed by a weekend away on a camping trip. It’d taken some arguing, but they liked the idea in the end.

A quick shower and I was off to bed. At least, that was the plan. Leave it to Edward to ruin one of the few nights I had a chance to get some real sleep. But there he was sitting at my kitchen table with two steaming cups of coffee in front of him. Yippee. 

“I found an earlier flight,” he explained before I could even ask.

Whoa, wait. Edward was explaining? And without me having to yell at him first? I could already tell this was going to be a strange night.

I settled down in the chair across from his, picking up the mug in front of me and downing nearly half of it before he spoke up again.

“So, care to tell me what all this ‘weird shit’ is that’s been happening?”

“Well, it seems as though I’m gaining powers like a master vampire. I have an animal to call, I got the _ardeur_ , and I am the master of a second triumvirate between myself, Nathaniel, and Damian. The second triumvirate was actually made before Santa Fe, but… Whatever, it’s there.”

“And the _ardeur_ is…?”

“You mean there’s something that the great Death doesn’t know?” I teased, secretly hoping he’d drop it.

“Anita, answer the question.” 

So much for being hopeful.

“Well, you know that vampires get their life – energy – whatever they have – through blood. What most people don’t know is that some vampires have a secondary way of feeding,” I answered hesitantly.

“The _ardeur_ is another way of feeding, then?”

“Yes…” I already dreaded his next question.

“What do you feed from?”

“Is this really all that important? It’ll probably be gone when this is over.” I didn’t add that I probably would be, too.

“It can’t be that bad. Tell me.”

Oh, but it was that bad. It was worse. At least, it was in my book.

I took a deep, calming breath. Here goes nothing… “Sex,” I whispered.

“Excuse me?” he asked with a long blink. He actually seemed a little shocked.

“The _ardeur_ feeds off of sexual energy,” I managed through gritted teeth as I fought the blush that claimed my face.

“So, that means that you…”

“Yes, that means that I can – no, that I have to – feed from it too.”

“You have to?”

“If it goes too long without being fed, it either turns into bloodlust like a vamp’s or the hunger for flesh that a lycanthrope experiences. Once it even started draining Damian’s energy. It can be put off somewhat if I eat more actual food, but it has to be fed pretty often. I still don’t quite have control over it,” I admitted.

“Practice makes perfect.”

“I don’t want to practice controlling it, Edward. I want it gone. I want all of this gone. There’s no way to break the marks except death.”

“Are we only killing one triumvirate, or both?” he asked.

“I… I couldn’t do that to Nathaniel.”

“Then it’s only Jean-Claude, Richard, and Damian that we’re killing.”

“No, leave Damian alone. Killing him would be too big a risk,” I sighed.

“Anita…” he trailed off as if unsure how to say whatever he was thinking.

“What is it, Edward?”

“You don’t think you’re going to live through this.”

It really wasn’t a question, so I didn’t answer it. Instead, I countered with one of my own: “What happened between you and Donna?”

“We came to an understanding.” He looked away then, focusing his gaze on the side of his coffee mug.

“Is she still alive?”

“As far as I know, yes.”

“You don’t want to talk about it, huh?”

“No.” He wouldn’t meet my eyes.

“Tell me later?” I asked, still trying for optimism.

He glanced up at me, probably because he’d caught the tone in my voice, but only shrugged and didn’t answer. Typical Edward, always so stoic.


	4. Time For Toys

***** CHAPTER FOUR: Time For Toys *****  

The next morning I found myself standing in the middle of Edward’s hotel room, and I think my jaw was somewhere on the floor near my feet. Pure shock was written on my face. I’d always known he came prepared, but this… Wow, just wow. Swords, daggers, throwing knives, dirks, and quite a few sharp pointy weapons I didn’t even have a name for were laid out neatly on one side of the room. In the middle, sitting on the table, were boxes of bullets. The other side of the room had machine guns, snipers, rifles, revolvers, semi-automatics, and again some guns I couldn’t begin to place. It was amazing.

And, to top it off, Edward wasn’t even done unpacking yet. He was still pulling out crossbows, axes, flamethrowers, short spears… The list goes on and on, ending with vials of what looked like silver. Then again, everything in the room had silver: beautiful, shiny, expensive silver.

“I wasn’t aware we had an army to go with us,” I said quietly. It was supposed to come out teasingly, but instead it was only an awed breath of air. I sat down on the bed as I tried to regain control of my voice.

“I wasn’t sure how you wanted to do it, so I brought some options. What’s the plan?” he asked as he turned to me.

“I have no idea. I’ve only just decided to do this. I don’t really have all the details sorted out yet. It’s basically go in, kill, run like hell.”

“Run?” 

“We’re killing the Master of the City and the Ulfric. Of course we have to run afterwards, Edward.” 

“You don’t think your friends will protect you?” For once, there was no trace of malice when he said ‘friends’. It was like, now that I would be free of my ties, they weren’t quite as monstrous. Interesting.

“They have their rules. I have no right to claim exception from them. At least, I won’t when this is over. And you certainly don’t, either.”

“That’s true. But, for now, let’s worry about forming a plan of attack.”

“Actually… I think I might have something in mind,” I mused.

After about two hours of scheming, we had it. Edward was calling me out on a case, but I wanted to say goodbye to them before I left and make arrangements concerning who I took with me and such. I’d be packing while we talked, so we would meet at my house. Edward was picking me up, of course, so there was no reason to be suspicious when he showed up. The only thing that was truly a lie was the part about Edward calling me on a case. I’d called him, after all, and it wasn’t exactly a case… yet.

“I should probably be the one to take out Jean-Claude. I don’t have to worry about him biting me, or rolling my mind,” I pointed out. “Is there somewhere around here you could set up the sniper?”

“Yes.”

“Good. I can get Richard by the window for you. Then, while Jean-Claude is hurt… Shit! That won’t work. I’ll be hurt, too.”

“I could call in another backup. He’ll sniper Richard or Jean-Claude, and I’ll take out the other one. How hurt will you be, Anita?” he asked, sitting on the bed next to me.

“Well…” I really didn’t want to tell him this. “Just one of their deaths, alone, might be enough to kill me. I don’t think it will, though. But I don’t know if I can make it through both.” I refused to meet his eyes.

“You want to be free of them badly enough to risk dying?”

“Yes.”

“You’ll make it through this, Anita. If anyone can do it, I know it’s you.” He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and hugged me to him. “You’ve always come through in the end.”

“There’s a first time for everything,” I sighed as I leaned into the hug.

Edward was hugging me. I was enjoying it. Oh my God. Since when did Edward hug? Or try to comfort me? Or sound almost like he was worried about whether or not I’d live through the next fight? Okay, so he usually cared whether or not I’d live. But that wasn’t the point! What was the point? It felt good. It felt really, really good. And that was more than a little frightening. Who knew Edward could be so… sweet?

“Who are you going to call for backup?” I asked, trying to distract myself from my thoughts. I couldn’t afford to be thinking about him like that, not now.

“Chase. He’s one of the best, and he owes me a few. He’ll be here this afternoon. You can have the house clear then, right?”

“It’s clear all weekend. What’s the story if Richard smells him?”

“I sent him ahead to keep an eye out until I could get there.”

“That works,” I nodded. My head was still on his shoulder, so it felt almost like I was caressing him with my cheek. I stifled the urge to do just that.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this, Anita?”

“I have to do this, regardless of how okay I am with the probable outcome.”

“I know. I’m just…” He stopped before he could finish that train of thought. It was probably just as well. This wasn’t the time for a heart to heart.

Then again, it’s not like we’d have another chance.

“I should be going. The pard will get home pretty soon, and I need a shower before they get there. We wouldn’t want them to smell you on me when you’re not supposed to be here yet,” I lied. I pulled away from him and was out the door before he could respond.

…And before I could lose the rest of my sanity and start that little heart to heart.


	5. Last Chance

***** CHAPTER FIVE: Last Chance *****

The rest of the morning went by without anything of interest happening. All of the weapons I wasn’t wearing had been packed away, along with a good portion of my clothes. I left the last bag only half-packed, so it looked like I was still in the process for when Richard and Jean-Claude arrived.

The phone rang a little after four o’clock. It was Edward calling to tell me that Chase was all set up and ready. I waited until a few minutes before sunset to call the boys and tell them to come over. They didn’t argue, just agreed to show up as soon as the sun had gone down.

I was my bedroom, taking a few items of clothing from my closet, when they came in.

“Anita, this is so crazy. You drop everything in a heartbeat to run help him, when you barely have any time to really spend with us. Why?” Richard asked.

“It’s not just about helping out a friend. It’s about saving innocent lives.” 

“ _Ma petite_ , I sincerely hope Monsieur Edward is not taking you back to Santa Fe. It is not safe territory,” Jean-Claude pointed out.

“I have no intention of going there,” I answered truthfully as I folded the clothes.

“Do you know where you’re headed?” 

“No. I’ll be sure to tell you as soon as I do, Richard.”

“Be reasonable, _ma petite_. You worry us so. How will you feed the _ardeur_ while you are away?”

“I’ll take Nathaniel. I’ll take Micah, too, if the pard could stay at the circus. I still don’t quite trust them on their own. I was also thinking I might ask to take Jason. I shouldn’t be gone long enough to need more than that.”

“Jason?” Richard sounded incredulous.

“You know that he’s fed me in the past.”

“You do not wish to take any of my vampires with you, then?”

“No. I can’t guarantee they’d have a safe place during the day. I’d rather not risk any of them,” I explained.

I heard the front door open and close, followed by soft footsteps. Edward had finally arrived.

“Could one of you grab Sigmund for me?” I asked, motioning to the pile of stuffed penguins. I knew that it would be Jean-Claude who moved to the window to look for what wasn’t there. Sigmund was safely tucked away, like my weapons.

Edward walked into the room and stood off to the side, as usual. It just happened to also be near Richard.

I jumped at the sound of glass cracking, but didn’t land on my feet. I collapsed to the floor, writhing in pain. I imagine Richard must have been spasming on the bed, where he’d been sitting, but at the time all I could think of was the mind-numbing shock of it all. I mean, of course I’d known it would happen. I’d known it would hurt. I’d known it would probably kill me. But to know it and to actually experience it were very, very different things. I didn’t hear the gunshot that killed Richard. I didn’t see Edward decapitate Jean-Claude. I didn’t know what was happening around me. But suddenly he was there, holding me in his arms. I was coughing up blood. I was bleeding from my nose, and probably my eyes and ears. But it didn’t seem to matter. I could see him. I could still speak for a little while. I could’ve told him what I’d wanted to say ever since I’d lied to him back in Santa Fe. I could’ve told him how I really thought about him, how I really felt. I could’ve, but I didn’t.


	6. The Hospital

***** CHAPTER SIX: The Hospital *****

The world was black. I could hear the beeps of the heart-monitor, the whir of the air conditioning, the man crying beside me… Wait, who was crying? And why? I tried to open my eyes, but couldn’t do it. I tried to move at all, willing my body to thrash as violently as possible. I think my fingers twitched.

“Anita?” the man whispered.

I recognized the voice, but couldn’t place it. Who was he? I tried to move again, praying for it to work. I think my hand shifted slightly.

“You’ve been in a coma for so long. They want to unplug you. I won’t let them. I keep fighting them on it, but it’s not up to me. Your will said not to keep you alive. They won’t listen to me,” he sighed mournfully.

That’s not right. I’d changed my will. I wanted to stay plugged in.

“Nathaniel and Damian are dead. I don’t really understand how these triumvirate things work, but I think you used them up to keep yourself alive.”

My mind frowned at that. Had I really killed them to save myself? I tried to reach out to them, but there was only me. I was alone in my head. I had no ties to anyone. I was free. And now they were going to take that away by unplugging the machines.

“You have to wake up, Anita. I need you,” he whispered. 

He needed me? It struck me as odd. He was usually so distant, so unemotional. He’d never needed anyone. He was… Edward.

“Come back. Please, come back. Don’t leave me. Not like this. Not because of them. Wake up,” he pleaded.

I tried again. I willed my eyes to open. I begged and prayed for them to open, even if it was only for a moment.

Nothing.

“Come on, Anita. If you can hear me, wake up.”

I wanted to tell him that I was awake. I wanted to be able to open my eyes and move my body. My head was screaming. I wanted to scream with it. Maybe my body whimpered.

“Anita? Oh God, please tell me I’m not imagining things. Do it again, Anita!” Edward sounded so frantic. 

I tried again, with all my might. I think I felt the air move through my lungs just then. I think I managed another small noise.

He must’ve pushed the button to call a nurse, because I sensed another person enter the room and he was yelling for them to get my doctor.

“Mr. Forrester, I’m starting to get very tired of having you here. What is it now?” a man’s voice asked.

“You can’t unplug her, Dr. Burnap. She’s waking up,” Edward explained. He didn’t even bother to use his Ted voice.

“We’ve been over this. There is virtually no chance of her recovering now.” 

“I know you keep telling me that. Please, just listen. Anita, show him that you’re there. Show him that you’re still here.”

I couldn’t refuse his pleading tone. Not that I would’ve, even if I had been able to. I wanted to wiggle my fingers again, but I wasn’t sure if they’d see it, so I tried to scream while I willed my body to move.

“That means nothing, Ted. While the mind is still slightly functioning, the body will occasionally twitch or sigh.” 

“No, it’s her. I know it’s her!”

“Okay, calm down. Let’s do a little test. Then will you be satisfied?” the doctor asked, clearly annoyed.

“Yes.” 

“Anita, I want you to open your eyes.”

“No, she can’t do that yet. She can only move her hand a little and make quiet noises. She can’t really move yet.”

“The body does those naturally.”

“Just tell her which one to do, Dr. Burnap. Please.”

“Fine. Anita, I want you to make a noise for me,” he said.

I did, but it was getting harder to do. 

“Now I want you to move your hand.”

I could barely hear him now, he sounded so far away. I tried, not sure if I could.

“Mr. Forester, it was just a coincidence.”

“No, give her time. She’ll do it.” 

“It’s not really her. It’s just her body.”

“Watch her, damn it!” Edward nearly screamed at the other man.

I kept trying, and was rewarded by a little twitch.

“Again,” the doctor ordered.

I tried again, knowing my life depended on this one small movement.

“My God, she really is awake in there. How is this possible? No one has ever woken up after so long,” he gasped.

How long had I been gone? They were acting so strangely.

“Help her. Do something, doctor. Please!”

Edward sure was pleading a lot. What in the world had happened that could’ve changed him so much?

“It’s risky, but… Well, it might work.”

“Do it. Whatever it is, do it.”

There were footsteps, a door opening and closing, followed by too much commotion for me to guess what was happening. Then, the machines stopped.


	7. Resurrection

***** CHAPTER SEVEN: Resurrection *****

It was so quiet. It was so cold. But it was so comforting. I had the sensation of floating through time and space. It was as if they didn’t exist anymore. It was as if nothing mattered here, wherever here was. Peace. I felt at peace.

Then there was pain. Burning on my chest, coursing through my veins. Unbearable.

No more. I was floating again. I felt happier than I could ever remember being in life. This must be heaven.

Pain again. Sharp. Vibrating through my body. Stinging my chest. And noises, yelling. Harsh lights beating against my closed eyes. A frantic beeping sound, like an electronic heartbeat. My heartbeat. It was the sound of my heart. I was in a hospital bed. They were trying to bring me back to life. But I didn’t want to come back. I wanted to stay where I’d been. I wanted to float.

“I need you, Anita. Live for me. You’re my soul-mate,” a voice whispered.

“Not like lovey-dovey. Never romantic thought. Lie,” I whispered back. It wasn’t exactly coherent, but it was the best I could do in my current state. 

“Please, stay with me. I love you,” the voice whispered. 

All thoughts of floating vanished as those last three words registered. I stopped trying to escape the confines of my body, letting myself be pulled back in. I opened my eyes to see doctors and nurses looking down at me, relief clearly written on their faces. But they weren’t who I wanted to see. I couldn’t find him. I tried to sit up, but I was strapped to the bed.

“Alright, let’s get this equipment out of here. Make some space,” one of the nurses said as she started wheeling out the defibrillator.

Within moments, the room was cleared. I was alone. Then he was there, leaning against the door frame, and looking at me with those pale blue eyes. He looked tired, but his usual blank mask was firmly in place.

“You’re back. Good,” he nodded. 

He was just like the Edward I had always known. The one who didn’t care.


	8. Confession Time

***** CHAPTER EIGHT: Confession Time *****

“Edward, come and sit. You look tired,” I pointed out.

It was a feeble attempt at breaking the ice, but it worked… somewhat. He sat in the chair across the room.

“No, over here. Sit with me. Talk with me.”

“We can talk from where we are now.”

“Why won’t you come any closer?” I challenged. I was both annoyed by his childishness and frustrated by his coldness. I let it show in my voice.

He just raised an eyebrow. No comment.

“I had the strangest dream while I was… gone,” I said thoughtfully.

He leaned back, as if to relax, but I saw the sudden tension in him.

“Do you want to hear about it?”

“If you want to tell me, go ahead. You know I’ll listen.”

“I was floating, and you called me back. You saved me. But the strange part is that I don’t think it was a dream.” I closed my eyes and waited for his response.

“What makes you think that?” he asked after a moment’s pause. 

“It didn’t feel like it was a dream. But I don’t know what to make of it.”

“Which do you want it to be?”

“Why would that matter? Either it happened or it didn’t,” I shrugged.

“Call me curious.”

“You don’t get curious, Edward.”

“Sometimes I do.”

“About what?”

“About you, mostly.”

“Oh?” I opened my eyes to look at him again, willing him to continue.

He didn’t.

“Did it happen, Edward? Did you ask me to stay?”

“Do you want it to have happened?”

“What I want is beside the point.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Either you said it or you didn’t. How I feel about it won’t change that. It won’t change how you feel,” I sighed and closed my eyes again. I couldn’t take that icy look any longer.

“Answer the question, Anita.”

“No. This is one time where you’ll just have to answer first if you want to know.”

“Tell me exactly what you heard and I’ll tell you if I said it to you while you were unconscious,” he agreed.

“Did you say Nathaniel and Damian are dead?”

“Yes.”

“Did you ask me not to leave you like that, because of them?”

“Yes.”

“Did you tell me you need me?”

“Yes.”

“Did you tell me you love me?”

“Yes.”

“Do you?

“I have never lied to you, Anita. It’s your turn.” 

“I wanted it to be real,” I answered softly. I couldn’t meet his gaze any more than I could stop the blush that flamed over my cheeks or the smile that quirked up my lips. “I wanted you to love me, like I… Like I love you,” I added in a whisper.

“Let’s get you home.”


End file.
